| Named after a very special comic that most 90's generation people know and remember... I'd like to say a few words pertaining to the Michael Jackson Memorial at the Staples Center. But I'll give a little background before I reveal my thoughts about the event. Bare with me, you might have a similar story: My aunt gave me my first Michael Jackson cassette, right after it came out; "Dangerous". But for years before that, my cousin and I used to watch Moonwalker and MJ's concerts at her apartment every time we went over. And would dance and sing all over the place. I knew that I loved his music even when I was really young. I started collecting all of his cassettes that were out at that time--Thriller was SO cool! I listened to it constantly. My family went to Epcot in FL and saw Captain EO in 3D (which was awesome!!!) a few times and we all got Capt EO posters (again, which were awesome!!!) and I got one of the Jim Henson featured puppets which was named Fuzzball (again, AWESOME!!!). A few yrs later I got the Disney Adventures book with Michael on the cover and wondered why he was white. And why was he so..pretty? Questions grew as I did about a secretive and very different fellow. Then the molestation allegations. I went back and forth constantly in my mind, praying that he didn't do it and not understanding why any kid would lie about something like that...questions, questions. And getting no concrete truth throughout any of it. But I knew one thing for sure, the media was poisonous to him and that was so clear to me. And I knew who to blame for how eccentric he became, why his behavior appeared so contrary. Who wouldn't run from it?? He seemed to not be in the public eye as much after that but whenever I did see him, he seemed so transformed from the last time I saw him. Since he was always denying that he had anything done to his face, I didn't understand why he would lie about something so obvious and people knew anyway. And I wondered; if he can lie so distinctly about something like that, has he lied about other things??? My relationship with him and his music distanced themselves and many other musicians and entertainers came into my life. Lots of jokes were said about him over the years following but I did get the HIStory album, hoping to reconnect myself with such a big part of my upbringing. When my first big heartbreak happened I shut myself in my room and listened to "You Are Not Alone" for hours, day after day. It was publicized that MJ seemed to have quite a few health problems and sometimes on tv he appeared so frail and thin; I thought perhaps he was dying from some disease then. Not that I wanted that, I was sick at the time and thought maybe he had been too. Then he "had" children and etc,etc. And then, news of his death. I was shocked at first hearing it but not overwhelmingly surprised as most confess. I was watching The Amityville Horror today because I had never seen it, and I turned the channel during a commercial and discovered Mariah Carey singing at his Memorial. When the camera spanned back and I saw Michael Jackson's coffin for the first time and his picture onscreen, a flood of emotion hit me HARD and all the love I had for him as a child and all the hope he spread and goodness that he had stood for erupted in me. I watched the rest of the Memorial, crying as I would for a friend. There were beautiful things said and I was remarkably moved by the faith-sharing that was happening. Martin Luther King III, even Rev. Al Shapton. My heart ached though for MJ's daughter who broke down in tears onstage. I needed some time afterward to mourn. And so I took an entire afternoon to mourn and pray about it. It was best to remember the good times we had, even though my heart falls to the ground in sadness over the loss of a real Legend. |
